Our emotions are our reactions to particular circumstances and it builds up our stress levels which affect our well-being. As most of our health issues are caused by stress, we should unlearn our old patterns and create new ones to manage our emotions to get back to our natural state.
Join Maija Kovalevska, Reiki Master teacher and founder of Healing Hands Edinburgh ,and myself, Professional Coach, in an online live course over 4x 2 hours sessions to demystify your emotions and learn how to manage them in an holistic way. Each session will consist of talks, practical tips, group practice and Q&A and will leave you with the essential tools to use for continuing your journey.
Special offer: at the end of the course, each participant will benefit from an individual 45 min coaching session with Aude and 45 min Reiki session with Maija.
NOTE: This is a practical live course guided step by step by Maija and myself. Please make sure that you can attend every block as recorded sessions will not be provided.
Dernièrement, j’ai reçu beaucoup de demandes de personnes qui souhaitaient obtenir une explication sur ce qu’était réellement le coaching. Le titre de “coach” est largement utilisé dans beaucoup de domaines et dans certains esprits un “coach de vie” est une personne qui nous dit ce que nous devons faire, comment nous devons le faire et quand nous devons le faire.
Or 𝙡𝙚 𝙘𝙤𝙖𝙘𝙝 𝙥𝙧𝙤𝙛𝙚𝙨𝙨𝙞𝙤𝙣𝙣𝙚𝙡 𝙣’𝙚𝙨𝙩 𝙥𝙖𝙨 𝙪𝙣 « 𝙘𝙤𝙣𝙨𝙚𝙞𝙡𝙡𝙚𝙧 ». Un coach ne donne pas son avis, ne donne pas de conseils ou de jugements. Un coach pose les bonnes questions.
Comme le dit si bien l’article ci-dessous, 𝙡𝙚 𝙘œ𝙪𝙧 𝙙𝙚 𝙢𝙚́𝙩𝙞𝙚𝙧 𝙙𝙪 𝙘𝙤𝙖𝙘𝙝 𝙚𝙨𝙩 𝙡𝙚 𝙦𝙪𝙚𝙨𝙩𝙞𝙤𝙣𝙣𝙚𝙢𝙚𝙣𝙩, qui permet au coach d’emmener la personne coachée vers de 𝗻𝗼𝘂𝘃𝗲𝗹𝗹𝗲𝘀 𝗿𝗲́𝗳𝗹𝗲𝘅𝗶𝗼𝗻𝘀, 𝗿𝗲𝘀𝘀𝗲𝗻𝘁𝗶𝘀, 𝘀𝗼𝗹𝘂𝘁𝗶𝗼𝗻𝘀 que la personne trouvera par elle-même. « La puissance de l’approche est bien là. Loin des solutions toutes faites ou des formules miracles, le coaching demandera une vraie implication du coaché dans la découverte de ce qui lui conviendra le mieux et sera le plus efficace dans son exécution. Par ailleurs, l’objectif vers lequel le coaché se dirige est déterminé par le coaché ou le coaché et son entreprise. ».
Chaque personne est différente. La solution qui fonctionne pour moi, ne fonctionnera peut-être pas pour vous et inversement. Toute la magie du coaching est là, trouver ses propres solutions par rapport à sa propre personnalité.
N’hésitez pas à me contacter si vous êtes intéressés et que vous aimeriez des renseignements supplémentaires ou pour réserver une 𝗰𝗼𝗻𝘃𝗲𝗿𝘀𝗮𝘁𝗶𝗼𝗻 𝗶𝗻𝗶𝘁𝗶𝗮𝗹𝗲 𝗚𝗥𝗔𝗧𝗨𝗜𝗧𝗘 pour discuter du processus de coaching et de ce qui pourrait vous convenir !
𝗠𝗶𝘀𝗰𝗼𝗻𝗰𝗲𝗽𝘁𝗶𝗼𝗻𝘀 are our sworn enemies. They make us think that something is true and they paralyse our vision, when in reality it is only a prison that we created within ourselves according to popular sayings or rumours we hear. We all grew up with a quantity of preconceived ideas and we sometimes built ourselves around them, without realizing that they are not a truth. For example:
– You have to work hard in a job you don’t like – To succeed in life you have to study and have a degree – One must suffer to be beautiful – Black cats are bad luck, etc.
Imbued with these misconceptions or what someone has told us, we also created some 𝘀𝘁𝗲𝗿𝗲𝗼𝘁𝘆𝗽𝗲𝘀 within ourselves and made a reality out of them:
– I can’t do it and success is for others – I have bad grades at school so I will never be good for anything – I am unlucky and I have all the weight of the world on my shoulders – I’m overweight so I’m ugly – No one will ever love me
Some of these misconceptions and stereotypes are so deeply inside us that it seems difficult to get rid of them. But again, this is just a misconception. By realizing them, acknowledging them sincerely, everyone is able to start the journey to get rid of them and the process of healing.
This is also what 𝗰𝗼𝗮𝗰𝗵𝗶𝗻𝗴 is for: discover our own misconceptions, break up with our inner enemies, conquer our fears and find our freedom.
It is not a secret that our thoughts affect the course of our lives. All our beliefs and habits can push us forward and allow us to get what we want or keep us from moving forward and put a heavy weight on our shoulders.
We all have experienced this indefinable feeling that something is missing, this moment where we think that having this or that would make us happier or also that we will not have another opportunity to achieve something. This logic, called “scarcity mindset,” is the creator of many of our fears, our anxiety, and sometimes even our despair. We sometimes spend more time grieving over what we are missing instead of appreciating and realizing what we already have.
Contrary to this type of logic is the “abundance mindset“, this mindset is the one with which we rejoice about what we have, we improve our performance, we are optimistic with the future, open-minded, grateful , confident, generous. The one with which we embrace life to the fullest!
In 1989, Stephen Covey recounts these two different types of mindset in his book “The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People”. He describes the abundance mindset as “a concept in which a person believes that there are enough resources and successes to share with others”. In contrast, the scarcity mindset is “destructive and unnecessary competition”. The idea behind the scarcity mindset is that “if someone wins or is successful, that means that the other person loses, without even considering all the others possibilities that would allow everyone to win”.
By listening to our reactions and emotions and understanding them, we can start to create an awareness of our type of mindset and act on our thoughts. We can create a more open and peaceful atmosphere around us. We can share what we have, give value to others. We can free ourselves from our own tensions and those that we have created with others. We can welcome positivity and joy. We can see all the possibilities.
Do you know the Pareto principle? It is an empirical principle, which means that it’s often encountered in practice. For example, it is considered that 80% of a company’s income is generated by 20% of the customers or in a completely different field that 20% of our clothes are worn 80% of the time.
It takes its name from Vilfredo Pareto who, at the end of the 19th century, carried out analyses of financial data and found that approximately 80% of countries’ wealth is owned by approximately 20% of the population. Over the years other studies have been carried out in different fields and it was a quality specialist named Joseph Juran who used for the first time in 1954 the expression “Pareto principle” who noted the 80/20 connection.
Application of the principle in everyday life
In 2004, the Englishman Richard Koch studied the subject. His purpose was to explain this principle in a way to inspire its application in everyday life and thus impact the achievement and happiness of each individual.
In his book “Living the 80/20 Way – Work less, Worry less, Succeed more, Enjoy more” he applies the reflection that 20% of our actions bring 80% of our happiness. In this case, why should we continue to focus on the 80% of actions that generate only 20% of results? It would be beneficial to identify these 80%, eliminate them and thus free up time, energy and money and reinvest them in actions that really matter.
Doing more by doing less
Koch says that doing less means getting more. Contrary to popular beliefs, for example, that we should work harder to succeed, we could work less and be more successful, we could be less anxious and enjoy life more, we could be less busy and be more present for people that really matter.
In summary, we should put more effort into simplifying life than complicating it and always find something that is both better and simpler, offer more with less.
The application in a nutshell
To start living the 80/20 principle, we have to focus on what we like and not try to do everything. This will free up time to do what is important to us. Then we need to focus on the best 20%, the 20% efforts that makes 80% of our happiness.
To achieve this result, Richard Koch proposes the method: destination, route and actions.
Define the Destination: Where do you want to go in the different aspects of your life (personal development, work and success, money, relationships, life in general)? Focus on what you like, on the things that are most important to you.
Define The Route: Find the easiest route for you to get there, the route that will require the less efforts and produce the desired results. Imagine all the probabilities. To give you an image, if you are a mountain biker, taking a mountain road will not require too much effort, but if you are a swimmer, crossing a lake will be more suitable for you.
Define Actions: Decide what actions to take depending on the Destination and Route chosen, and define the order of completion and what is the most important. There is no need to set deadlines, the important thing is the Destination.
This may seem somewhat simplistic, but it is a very effective tool. However, as with many personal development tools, this requires regular reassessment and personal involvement. But at the end, it’s always worth it 🙂
“If you want something you’ve never had, you must be willing to do something you’ve never done. “
Take the example of that picture : the woman sees clearly a “6”, the man sees clearly a “9”. No one is wrong. Both are right on their own way. Everything is a matter of perspective.
Our perspective is the way we see something, according to our background, our culture, how we have been raised, our values. That forms our beliefs about ourselves, about others, and about the world : the meaning we give to events, the way we make sense of our lives, etc, is based upon our core beliefs.
We look at situations, events and interpret what people say or do, according to our own perspective. Our minds are constantly trying to find a sense of our world, forming judgements and opinions and making assumptions.
Not always easy, but always worth it
It takes a lot of courage, determination, and action to change our perspective. It’s not an overnight process, it takes a good amount of time to recondition your brain and train it to view things in the most beneficial way.
The important thing to remember is that your own perspective is just one version of what is happening. One version of the many version in our hands. We cannot control what someone else does or how some events suddenly happens. However, we can better manage our own expectations.